Never Again!

From my experiences, I have seen people that have the most impact in their personal and professional lives are the ones who have seen adversity, and deeply felt it to a point where a voice from the inside tells them, “Never Again”. Professionally, when I started off my career, I was appointed to lead a team for a startup. While presenting the startup to the President of the company, with the support of my team, I was able to deliver an impressive presentation. Interestingly, that resulted in the person who appointed me to lead the team, whispering in my ear, “There can’t be 2 sheriffs in 1 town”. And I couldn’t understand 2 things. How can the mayor demote himself to the sheriff and then imagine himself competing with the person who is enforcing the constitution that he is supposed to protect? Then in another position, I was told that I lacked communication and relationship-building skills while I was officially a guest speaker at various international and local conferences. And there are always those people reminding you that you are going way too fast for your age and when you will fall you won’t be able to get up because you have come too far already.

I have realized that what defines your contribution in life is the perspectives you have about situations and events happening around you. On a felt level, having a leader who is trying to choke and traumatize you to the point where you need to look at your resume to tell yourself you ain’t that bad, is not a good feeling and extremely demotivating. So, I decided, if and when I get an opportunity to lead, “Never again” will my team experience what I have seen and felt. So, half of my time in my current role is spent exploring ways to contribute and be of value. “Do you need me for anything? Can I be of any help?” are my trademark phrases around the organization. I work hard and listen harder because there is always a perspective around the corner that is more well-informed than mine. A perspective that allows me to be of greater service and deliver more value.

Then when the parents at school come in and meet a relatively young principal, their expressions are visible enough to make me experience an imposter syndrome – an uncomfortable feeling in which you doubt your skills, talents, and accomplishments. To overcome it, I remind myself of one of my favorite quotes by the late Kofi Annan from the British Council Future Leaders Connect Program in London that I was a part of:

“You are never too young to lead, and never too old to learn.”

On a personal front, I have seen and heard of terrible examples of relationships that adversely affect our lives quality. Nobody deserves to remain in a state of suffering. Nobody would like to be controlled and imposed on. If I don’t like a feeling, how can I expect the other person to be just fine with it? So, I decided “Never again” and got lucky enough to have married up. While I make all the important decisions, she decides what is important. And I have experienced how committed relationships can be a source of great liberation.

If somehow, we understand the power of “Never Again” and practice empathy to respond to the wide array of situations in our lives, we will develop respect, trust, and affection in our relationships. So, “Never Again” make excuses for who you are and be willing to adopt a growth mindset to become the best version of yourself. “Never Again”, be afraid to make a mistake, because if you are not making them, you are not trying hard enough. “Never Again”, feel ashamed of being vulnerable, for being vulnerable is being human.

Wishing everyone happiness, peace, and the opportunity to have someone tell them that they have changed their lives.

Yours Sincerely

Kamil Majeed

The Not-So-Ordinary Principal